Coaster reviews

Location Discomfort

Very strange ride, very strange profiling, janky as you like, very strange location in a basement in Camden. But you get plenty of laps for your plenty of pounds, the weird airtime hill does give a bit of floater before slamming your back into the seat, and it takes the final flat turn with some decent speed. Do love that there's an indoor coaster in London though, even if it is in Camden!

Airtimes Pace Masterpiece

Wicker Man has always been a ride that punches well above it's stature. The way the train rips through the course is crazy for a coaster with a listed top speed of 44mph, the sense of speed and intensity is just superb. Lots of great airtime pops throughout but the undoubted highlights are the first drop, the drop out of the statue and the drop off the turnaround in the back row, and the awesome speed hill before the final pass through the statue which is excellent in any row. Generally runs pretty smooth too, but not without that classic wooden coaster shake which just adds to the intensity. The theming is outstanding as well of course, goes without saying really. It's even more epic at night too, easily one of the best night rides in the country and it runs even faster on those late closes. It'll always be one of my favourites!

First Drop Capacity Intensity Too short Layout

I've probably been guilty of overhating Oblivion a bit in the past. I've had a good number of rides on it this year and it's fair to say that the drop is really quite superb, so so intense all the way down. Sure, that's all it is, but it hits hard enough to pull it off. Nice quick moving queue as well, particularly when it's on 2 stations. Being sat on the brake run for ages is a pain though, if anything it runs too many trains! Also it's a stunning night ride, the views of the park and the wider Staffordshire moorlands are just gorgeous, and dropping into total darkness makes the drop feel absolutely massive

Airtimes First Drop Masterpiece

Hyperia is the insanely good ride that Thorpe Park have needed for a while. I've had a lot of rides on it now but just as you think perhaps it's not quite delivering, you get that back row or front row and back up it goes. This thing is a kilometre of sheer unrelenting perfection, yes it's short but every element hits like a charging rhino and there isn't a yard of track that doesn't deliver. The entire ride is really a highlights reel of the very best elements of their kind: that crazy stalled dive loop, that intense immelmann with the excellent drop off, the frankly ridiculous outer banked barrel roll thing, and that first drop, which is just insane as you crest the top with nothing but a view of the ground approaching at warp speed. The second outerbank and final hill are excellent as well, and serve to wrap up the experience nicely. Trains are the usual supremely comfortable beauties we come to expect from Mack, joint best in the business in my view. Contrary to others, I love the style of the ride and the consistency of it along with the incredible Imascore soundtrack really fits the ride very well, a coaster this big and this doesn't need anything more. The ride is also really rather reliable now, the teething problems have passed and any downtime it does have seems to be very minimal, which is excellent for a ride in it's opening year. It is true that one of the trains has a bit more of a shake than the other, which hopefully they can look into, but nothing can stop Hyperia living in the highest echelons of European coasters. Mack Rides and Thorpe Park have a real masterpiece on their hands.

Lap Bar Fun Intensity Rattle Capacity

Spinball Whizzer suffers from what i'll call the Inferno effect. In that it's simply not as good as another coaster of the same type in a different park in the chain, in this case the elite Dragon's Fury at Chessington. That's perhaps lead to me being a bit harsh on it over the years. Judging it on it's own merit, the layout is fine, but not overly inspired. There are some opportunities for some good spinning action though, stick 2 heavies such as myself going backwards out of the station, with either 2 whippets or ideally no one facing forward, and the car flings itself round as it swings right off the lift hill in an excellent manner. It rides okay as well, it's not as smooth as Fury is but it doesn't batter you too much most of the time. Just like fury however, capacity is an issue, although at least at Towers it is merely a supporting cast member. Certainly worth a go if the queue is short though, and also great fun if there's a group of you!

Theming Location Intensity Rattle

New Nemmy has gained 3 things since it's redo. The amazing new theming, even more crazy intensity, and a terribly annoying rattle. Yes, somehow this basically brand new version is more rattly than it's 28 year old predecessor. You can look up and watch the wheel hubs shake throughout the layout, which is not what you want on a fully overhauled attraction. One train is definitely worse than the other, which gives some hope that it's an issue that can be rectified during the off season, but it's certainly not great from B&M. Fortunately the ride is redeemed somewhat by the amazing theming job, everything from the new soundtrack to the station is excellent, and all effects are still working as of the end of September. The layout of course is still excellent as well, the reprofiled zero g roll being the highlight, and it's feet-numbingly intense in numerous places, particularly in the afternoon on the back row. Still a top tier ride, as it always will be, just got to hope that they can fix the shaking!

Airtimes Location Masterpiece

What is there to say about Helix? Which adjectives really do this ride the justice that it deserves? Not even sure perfection quite cuts it. This has got to be the most complete ride layout in Europe, and possibly the world, the mix of forces you experience covers pretty much everything possible, from the crushing positives on the Norwegian loop, the excellent whip from the zero G roll, the hangtime on the inverted top hat and first corkscrew, the super aggressive left downward turn into the helix mid-ride, to the absolutely insane final airtime hill which is ridiculous sustained ejector like nothing else. There's zero wasted track either, thanks to the drop out of the station and the excellent final heartline roll, it's go go go from the very start till the very end. Combine all this with the stunning location on the hillside, the wonderfully comfortable Mack mega trains, the incredible Imascore soundtrack and excellent operations, and really Helix is the perfect ride. It's running superbly at the moment as well, really smooth, and it was actually having some issues with overspeeding during our visit, which is probably why it slapped so hard, but i'm not complaining apart from the fact I missed a rollback by 1 train. The launches get some stick, but the layout is so good that the fact they don't stack up to Taron or Taiga's launches really doesn't bother me - Taron's layout pales in comparison and even Taiga probably doesn't quite have the diversity that I love about Helix. Front and back are both excellent, however back row is best for me for the drop out of the station as well as the final hill from heaven. Don't pass up on riding it at night either, like all Mack coasters it warms up a lot and the train lights and general beauty of Liseberg in the dark really elevate the already incredible experience. I adore Helix and I hope to return to Liseberg as often as I can to ride it.

Airtimes First Drop Smoothness Dead spots Intensity

Balder is a tale of 2 halves. On one hand, you have an awesome first drop that's super steep and has great pull at the back of the train, and ejector hill after ejector hill which really hit very well. But in between, it's hampered badly by how forceless and overly smooth the turns are, when turns are half the ride, they need to do something, and they just don't. That this is a prefab makes the drop and hills very enjoyable as the airtime isn't hampered by roughness, but it leaves the turns doing nothing at all, they'd actually benefit from being flatter, CCI style turns where you got some good laterals rather than being as high banked as they are. Unfortunately that does mean I find it hard to really enjoy Balder, despite the airtime being really very good. The first drop particularly redeems it somewhat though, and 2 30-preson trains that barely stack means it eats through a queue really efficiently. Those trains are great as well, nice and comfortable and non-restrictive. A good woodie but could have been a lot better!

First Drop Location Comfort

Valkyria is an excellent dive coaster, my favourite of the ones i've ridden and one of my favourite B&Ms. The view from the top of the lift is stunning and you get a nice panoramic look across Liseberg and beyond as you turn towards the drop. The hold is the perfect length and the drop itself is really floaty on the front and pretty whippy on the back, into the misty tunnel. The rest of the layout is excellent with a diverse mix of inversions, hangtime, some intense turns and a pop of airtime as you drop down to the left. Runs super smooth as it was one of the last coasters before B&M started having some rattle issues. I - contrary to popular opinion it seems - find the vests really comfortable and not at all restrictive, I much prefer them on this model over the classic OTSRs. Its very nicely themed as well with an awesome Imascore soundtrack. Great ride, an excellent fit in Liseberg's lineup and a fantastic joint-second fiddle to Helix

Location Pace Duration

Lisebergbanan is a proper classic, approaching 40 years old, and even now it stacks up. You'd be hard pressed to come across a family coaster better than this one. It goes on and on and on, incredible length, and is pretty relentless with how it keeps the speed up. The ride is mostly sweeping turns and drops, with a few nice floaty moments and some snaps to the side. The focus is definitely on the speed and out of control feeling, which really delivers. It's a stunning location for a coaster too, the lifthill takes you right up the hillside then you wind your way down with some incredible interaction with Luna, Helix and FlumeRide in particular. The new trains the ride received a few years ago are comfortable, with a simple lap bar, if rather tight for taller riders. The capacity is insane as well, there's 5 trains available and it was running at least 3 for our visit, with a 4th loaded onto the track and put straight into operation when they queue exceeded just 15 minutes. Do watch the brakes, they hit super hard, enough for a warning sign to be on the brake run. Amazing coaster though, a proper nostalgic ride and by a mile my favourite family coaster

Location Fun Smoothness Capacity Lap Bar

The location makes this ride. You really feel very high up on the hillside, and the view is excellent. The ride itself is fun enough, and it does take the layout pretty fast as it's taller than the average family boomerang. I do find the lap bars very tight if you're a taller rider, and at a popular park like Liseberg the capacity is pretty poor. Good fun though and a nice intermediate coaster in the parks lineup

Theming Rattle Discomfort Pointless

These Zierer force models never seem to run very well from the few i've done. This one's particularly janky with some real bad turns and jolts. It's very pretty though so I will give it that

Airtimes Launch Intensity Harness

Stealth is short, sweet, and absolutely addictive. That launch is breathtaking every single time, and i've ridden Stealth more than any other coaster, it just never gets old. Cracking airtime on the top hat as well, and the brake run speed hill throws you up and forward, which can hurt after a while with the harness, but still great airtime. The base of the top hat on both sides is super intense too. Back row and front row are both excellent but you can't beat the front on a ride that is really just an incredible launch. Something else to love is the incredible operations, it's pretty much always run fantastically well, eats through the queues in no time, and when it's quiet, the infamous reride gate means 20+ laps per hour is easily achievable. There might be bigger and better at Thorpe Park now but Stealth still has much to offer, and in this world of hydraulic launches meeting their demise at quite the rate, I hope there's many more years in her yet.

Airtimes First Drop Masterpiece Lap Bar

Megafobia is straight out of God's playbook on how to do a woodie. The layout is immensely good, and the train absolutely hauls through the layout like something possessed. There's some crazy aggressive laterals in several sections, classic CCI turns with little banking that really throw you to the side. But its the airtime that makes the ride absolutely elite. The first and second drops in the back are amazing, full standing ejector, but it's the first hill in the front that is the star of the show after the retrack, that hill sends you absolutely sailing out of your seat, and the double down part 2 just adds the bit extra on. There's several other great moments too, but generally the airtime is better at the front of the train. Though you get it in pretty much every seat. The lap bars aren't the best, they do dig into your leg a bit, and whilst the retrack has smoothed out the majority of the worst spots, there's a particularly bad valley and the final turnaround is also pretty brutal now. But that doesn't detract from the fact that Megafobia is a truly elite coaster, particularly at night, and rightfully sits very high up in my UK rankings

First Drop Lap Bar Pace Rattle

Talk about presence. The area around Energylandia is pretty flat, so you can see Hyperion from miles around. It's also visible when flying into Krakow airport which is very cool. Its just massive and with it being the first thing you see of the park, it gets you so hyped to ride. And boy does it live up to that hype. You ascend the lift super fast, then get flung over that first drop. On the back it's seriously insane ejector, and the front is seriously insane hangtime. One of the best first drops I've ever experienced for sure. The following hill delivers great airtime, before the awesome dive loop turnaround that really whips you through. From there there's more airtime, a mix of floater and serious ejector, and lots of low down intense turns, which is amazing for the speed, it's paced really well and you fly into the brakes. The final hill before the splashdown is a great end as well, proper ejector on that. The front row is incredible but my afternoon ride on the back was right up there as one of my best ever coaster rides. The outer wing seats do have a pretty strong bounce to them, fortunately the trains are super comfortable so it's not a killer, but I do prefer the inside seats for a comfortable ride. It also has a really stupid queue line. But this is one elite ride, and thanks to Zadra's dire trains, its my favourite on park too

Fun Rattle

The mighty former Beastie from Alton Towers! Just a typical kids ride of course. I put rattle as "feels like it's gonna fall over" isn't an option. I was able to basically lift my lap bar out of the train which added to the thrill

Harness Discomfort

Not a great example of a Zyklon model. Rattly, uncomfortable and very sharp brakes. Was running 7 trains though so I'll give them that!

Theming Smoothness Duration Dead spots Lap Bar

Gold Rush is a ride that does a lot of things right. It's a well themed experience, nothing world beating but it's a very pleasant area and queue, and the station and launch scene are suitably detailed if a little predictable. The ride itself is very smooth, a very good duration for a family coaster, and really a very unique concept with the lift that also acts as a spike, along with the launch, which is really quite snappy, took me by surprise. The section that is traversed twice, forward and backward, is by a distance the best part of the ride, really fun in both directions with some good speed and some nice transitions. Unfortunately the section after the lift and the ending after the second little boost suffers from the simple problem of not quite being fast enough, the train crests the lift far too slowly and as a result, the turns and hills that should give some mild floaty air give nothing, and there's no snap at all. The lap bar is also poor, unlike Thirteens which is fully round, it has an uncomfortable point which digs into your waist and seems wholly unnecessary. Overall, it's a good ride, and excellent for a 1m height restriction, but some small tweaks could've really elevated it, and therefore the execution isn't quite there

Lap Bar Inversions Rattle Too short Dead spots

Probably an unpopular opinion, but this ride was better as a standup. The bizarre riding position papered over the vast chasm that is how bland the layout is and how little it really offers beyond the inversions. The new train itself is fine, and actually pretty comfy, the lap bar fits nicely across your thighs. But aside from the zero g roll, which is excellent still and very snappy, I just didn't find any of the rest of it as fun as it was as Shockwave. It's also developed 2 things I definitely don't like, a rattle which is annoying rather than painful, but still very much there, and shockingly terrible operations. It's probably the worst operated ride in the country at the moment, there's no reason at all that a train with a simple lap bar and no seat belt should take 5+ minutes to dispatch. Overall, the zero g roll saves the Wave from being a complete flop, but I can't help but wish it had stayed as the quirky stand up

Airtimes First Drop Pace Disappointing! Discomfort Lap Bar

Zadra was my first RMC, and I can honestly say I have no burning desire to ride another one. The trains and restraints on this ride are appalling for a coaster so aggressive, the lap bar is bad and very blocky, but the shin guards are completely unnecessary and completely destroy any enjoyment a layout this good should give you. I will say that i'm convinced this is a tall person issue, and i'm not small-built either so I doubt that helped, but when Intamin and Mack can make trains that ooze comfort on rides that are just as potent, there's really no excuse I can find to justify how poor these trains are. And Zadra is a speed-focussed ride, not an airtime-focussed ride, so I dread to think how uncomfortable I will find many of the other RMC coasters. It's the reason that I think Zadra is the most disappointing ride i've ever ridden. I will say again that this is not the experience most people will have, and certainly the layout of the ride leaves nothing to be desired, the pacing is simply relentless, the airtime moments it does have are strong, there's really no aspect of the layout that doesn't deliver. On layout and ride experience alone, this would be up with the very very best in Europe. Which just makes the fact it's ruined by just 1 thing even worse. I'll still rank it fairly high up, dropping it too far would do the layout and pacing a disservice, but my overriding feeling about Zadra is disappointment, and that is a terrible shame

Discomfort Pointless

Really don't get these super tiny coasters. They're very uncomfortable, offer nothing and would surely be better off being replaced with a family flat. Barely even worth the credit

Nice surprise! Fun Smoothness Too short

This is a baby vekome junior coaster, with a short but really fun and snappy layout. They do an awesome job with these and it fits the bill nicely. Decent theming as well. Very smooth and comfortable. Good fun family ride

Fun Smoothness

For a kids ride, this is a fun one. Decent layout, slightly more interesting than the standard you find in most parks. Trains aren't the best but then they aren't designed for adults. Runs smooth. A good family ride

Smoothness Layout

The longer and probably best family boomerang layout. There's plenty of these dotted around however this one gets extra points for the interaction with Fianna Force. Very smooth and enjoyable. Theming is unfinished currently but should look decent when it's done

Airtimes First Drop Intensity Discomfort Lap Bar

This decent sized woodie was a bit of a bucket list ride for me, and I was very pleased to find that it delivered and some. This layout is excellent, with an awesome mix of floater and ejector airtime, lots of intense turns and one of the great first drops, this thing on the back row is standing airtime all the way down and it's just immense. There's a few other great hills as well which deliver more very strong airtime. Overall the ride is reasonably smooth for a woodie of its age, however there is one section, in the lead up to the overbank and the overbank itself, which is really rather brutal, it would definitely benefit from some retracking through there. And the timberliner trains are certainly not the best, but at least they allow plenty of airtime. However that can't detract from how good a coaster it is and that first drop will always have a place in my heart

Airtimes Intensity Smoothness

Generally inverts focused solely to intensity are not my thing. And SLCs provide nothing but pain. Fianna Force however is a thing of beauty, the layout is so good and it runs so well, you get a wonderful mix of forces and sensations. The first drop is excellent, great hangtime at the front and awesome whip at the back. There's plenty of snappy turns that have some great intensity, the inversions flow wonderfully and there's some awesome airtime as well, particularly the final run of kinked hills and dips, it's a great finale to the ride. It's super smooth as well, not a hint of rattle or jolt anywhere on the circuit, and the lap bars and seats are superbly comfortable, up there with Mack and Intamin lap bars in my top 3 train designs. My only criticism, which is the same with all the new age vekomas I've ridden, is that whilst the entire ride is very good, it perhaps lacks that one standout moment, which does just lose it a point. Nonetheless though, it's a superb ride, beautifully themed too, and the best inverted coaster I've ridden to date

Theming Layout Ejectors Headbanging Capacity Discomfort

You need to know how to ride Saw. Knowing where to sit (back row), knowing where the potholes are (specifically the bottom of the main drop), knowing which transitions are bad (dive loop, turn into the brakes), and knowing to keep your head well forward, are all key to not hating the ride. This takes time and I don't think many people will enjoy their first time riding. I certainly didn't. But nowadays I am at least sometimes able to enjoy it,. It's still not all that comfortable but there's some real highlights to the layout, in particular the overbank and airtime hill, and the indoor section which really is superb, the first drop being the best part of the whole ride. The theming is excellent as well, I'm not a fan of IPs generally but they did a great job with it, and the theme fits the ride experience really well. Unfortunately, it is too much like russian roulette, you can have a back row on a smoother train and it's fine, or you can have a front row on a rough train and it kills you. You can never look forward to it because you never know how its going to end up. Plus the queue can be a real slow mover but recently Thorpe have been running it well. Plenty to like about it but far too much to dislike for it to ever be elite.

Fun Smoothness Duration Discomfort

This ride is waaayyyyy too fun. The world's biggest wacky worm is an excellent family ride. Not very fast, not very tall, but very enjoyable. Extremely smooth as well it has to be said. The only discomfort comes from the size of the trains, but then it is a kids ride. Still, really quite unique and hilariously good

Headbanging Harness Discomfort

It's not InFusion bad, but it's not far off. All the usual problems and pain you have with an SLC but with a bonus helix. The best part of the ride was when it broke down before I got on it

Inversions Intensity Rattle Too short

I was expecting this to be a piece of hot garbage, but it wasn't all that bad. It's a bit rattly, but it seems the previous jolt of death I had been dreading has been ironed out, that came as a great relief when I hit the brakes with my head still attached to my spine. Otherwise it's pretty intense, but a short and uninspiring layout. Theming is okay but nothing to shout about. I'll take the fact I was pleasantly surprised though