Reviews • Flynn C.

Hyperion surprised me - I honestly assumed that Zadra would be my favourite but this mega gave me something to think about. Back gives you an insa...

Hyperion surprised me - I honestly assumed that Zadra would be my favourite but this mega gave me something to think about. Back gives you an insane whip over the hills and the element of surprise - however the front gives you some bonkers ejectors. The first drop is incredible, and the ejection out of the initial camelback is insane. Feels ridiculously fast (because it is). Pure magic. Not a single rattle in my experience, though the operators do have a tendency to pin you a bit.

What a ride. Best wooden in the country for the ride itself (Wickerman pips for overall experience) - fantastic airtime and a long layout that does no...

What a ride. Best wooden in the country for the ride itself (Wickerman pips for overall experience) - fantastic airtime and a long layout that does not let up. It is not butter smooth, definitely can feel the transitions from the retracked areas to the old areas but it is no way uncomfortable (and for wooden coasters, a certain level of roughness is expected). A masterpiece. RIP the GOAT 😔😔

Such a relaxing ride and surprisingly comfortable. The 'backwards' / on your back portion is so fun. Makes a great break from the more intense rides o...

Such a relaxing ride and surprisingly comfortable. The 'backwards' / on your back portion is so fun. Makes a great break from the more intense rides of the park but does desperately need retheming and some under track theming (which it currently completely lacks, so makes for an ugly visual). I gather they will retheme to fit with the Phalanx vibe, but lets hope it's sooner rather than later! This is not the ride I would remove from the park, as I think it serves a niche in the country and the park - so I do hope it stays, as it is a perfectly fine and reliable thing.

So, nemesis is not a ride to my taste - I like drops, hangs and airtime and nemesis delivers none of that. But I can acknowledge how insane this littl...

So, nemesis is not a ride to my taste - I like drops, hangs and airtime and nemesis delivers none of that. But I can acknowledge how insane this little beast is, and I still love it. It is excellently paced, it is strong throughout without any dead moments. The proximity to the terrian and theming is elite and adds chopper moments. Each inversion is smooth and grants amazing forces, and it is whippy as all hell. I did not detect a true rattle on my rides, but it did seem bumpier than I'd expect (seems a train issue more than a track) - this did not register during the ride, but only in the aftermath so was not at all a dealbreaker for me. This is a world-class invert, and whilst not to my taste (i.e., not my favourite) I 100% get why people rate it so highly. The new theming is fantastic. A classic.

3 rides, front(ISH), back and middle(ISH). All are good in their own right. Think the only thing that describes this ride is bonkers. On par with Hype...

3 rides, front(ISH), back and middle(ISH). All are good in their own right. Think the only thing that describes this ride is bonkers. On par with Hyperia for funky elements that feel indescribable. Really strong first drop, not as intense as Hyperion but the remainder of the ride delivers bags of hang, airtime and flow unlike anything. It is a masterpiece but may not be my favourite ride to date - time will tell.

Another kiddie coaster and it's fine - one of the better and certainly better than a bog standard tivoli. Nice and low to the ground but the theming i...

Another kiddie coaster and it's fine - one of the better and certainly better than a bog standard tivoli. Nice and low to the ground but the theming is a bit trash in this area.

This one surprised me. It is known that I am not an inversion heavy person, positive g's are not my bag. YET Smiler has won me over. The sheer mania o...

This one surprised me. It is known that I am not an inversion heavy person, positive g's are not my bag. YET Smiler has won me over. The sheer mania of not really knowing where you are in the ride is just something, and that's only elevated by how compact this ride is. You don't absolutely speed through each element, so it does not feel dizzying until you actually depart. The lift hills build just the right amount of suspense and I adore the little bunny hops of airtime to break up that positive force that has been built up. It is a masterpiece in pacing when considering the record it holds - and as a result that record may take years still to break. The theming is demented, hilarious and brilliant. The only downside for me is that it currently has a noticeable clunk in to the valleys and is in need of some repainting - could benefit from some work which I expect will come soon. Unexpected winner.

Prefacing this with - this is meant to be a family ride, so do not expect be super intense but also... in the same vane do not expect it to be tame. T...

Prefacing this with - this is meant to be a family ride, so do not expect be super intense but also... in the same vane do not expect it to be tame. The theming is literally world class, especially for any wooden coaster. The pre-show somehow works with the queuing system (and I don't even know how). The best thing about this ride is how different and great the front and back feel - most rides there is a clear winner. This one there is not. Front feels incredibly whippy, it feels unruly in speed and the laterals are insane. Whereas at the back, though there is no big drop, you get huge pops of airtime and a less lateral heavy ride. So I love the back, but my brother loves the front, and I think that's awesome. This ride, it's something else, it's deceptive, dynamic and a joy to ride. End of day rides on a warm day, are elite. An absolutely insane part of Alton's line up.

Right. This is a real one trick pony. Being the first B&M dive coaster it is a bit of a novelty, and the sheer ridiculous nature of building the drop ...

Right. This is a real one trick pony. Being the first B&M dive coaster it is a bit of a novelty, and the sheer ridiculous nature of building the drop in to the ground is so sick. The drop is good, the best at the park (not that there's any competition) and it does it well. I wish they could hold the pause longer, even by 1-2s. The ejector from the drop is pleasant and the fact it even goes underground into darkness and the mist does up the intensity. It is very solid, but not much to it and that's okay.

Honestly, this ride is nearing the end of its life. The launch is punchy, and only shadows to stealth. However, it is rough and rickety so everything ...

Honestly, this ride is nearing the end of its life. The launch is punchy, and only shadows to stealth. However, it is rough and rickety so everything after the launch is rendered distracted forcelessness as a result. You manage some floater airtime on route but lord. This thing needs to go, replace it with something less painful. Because honestly, the layout does not warrant a renovation. The theming does not tie in well, and the fact they haven't upped the theming is maybe a good thing for us rita non-enjoyers.

I desperately wish the trim on the drop was not there because even with it, the drop rivals most at the park. The layout to the shed is a bit meanderi...

I desperately wish the trim on the drop was not there because even with it, the drop rivals most at the park. The layout to the shed is a bit meandering, and should be longer with more elements but it is a pleasant ride. The best part is that drop track, really funny and then the backwards snaking is fab. The humourously fast drive back in to the station is great too :') Theming is great, and it is a very strong ride, that I wish they just let it be less trimmed and made the changes to the trains to allow it - but alas.

It is not the best maurer spinner in the country, Dragon's Fury has that title, but it is still solid. Could use better blending in to the surrounding...

It is not the best maurer spinner in the country, Dragon's Fury has that title, but it is still solid. Could use better blending in to the surrounding themed areas - sticks out so much, and has done for several years. Best ridden unbalanced as always but a good bit of fun.

'Choo Choo'. I love this ride, and for the most part I love it because the ops clearly have the time of their life running this one. It's pot luck how...

'Choo Choo'. I love this ride, and for the most part I love it because the ops clearly have the time of their life running this one. It's pot luck how many cycles you get, if it's quiet and the last ride of the day - good luck you'll be there till sundown. Great interactions with the rapids, wonderful vantage points and neat theming. Just enjoyable, not thrilling but it ain't meant to be. What flying fish wishes it was.

A retrospective. I remember loving this ride when I was younger, and vividly remember it getting rougher and rougher, until it was unrideable. Corkscr...

A retrospective. I remember loving this ride when I was younger, and vividly remember it getting rougher and rougher, until it was unrideable. Corkscrew was a game changer for the UK and I am glad Alton paid homage and kept their track for their entrance. In truth, corkscrew was my first taste of an inversion and for that - I remember it fondly.

I have to give my kudos the Drayton. The theming (and retheming of Frontier Falls) is fantastic. The ride is insanely smooth (never ridden anything th...

I have to give my kudos the Drayton. The theming (and retheming of Frontier Falls) is fantastic. The ride is insanely smooth (never ridden anything this smooth before) and is utterly unique. Cycle 1 is a little more tame than cycle 2 (all hail cycle 2). The tire drive launches are surprisingly punchy and pick up a lot of speed, leading to some really pleasantly whippy cornering and the drops are actually decent, and it is fantastically paced. It is the best true family coaster in the country and one of my tops in the country. I would not be surprised if we see more of this type of thing opening up around the world. If drayton keeps this up, we could see ourselves with quite the family park battle on in the UK.

The new trains are pretty comfortable (albeit ugly), so imagine my surprise to find that the inversions were really quite rough and headache inducing....

The new trains are pretty comfortable (albeit ugly), so imagine my surprise to find that the inversions were really quite rough and headache inducing. Either way, the zero-g roll is fantastic and the inversions are surprisingly intense - not to my taste but a lot will like it. I dread to think how uncomfortable this would have been standing up.

Quite a forceless family boomerang, but does it's job and is fairly smooth. The theming is out of place and jumbled, but hopefully they will capture i...

Quite a forceless family boomerang, but does it's job and is fairly smooth. The theming is out of place and jumbled, but hopefully they will capture it in to the western area and make it look the part for next year.

Endlessly charming, has some good airtime and I hope lives for many many more years. It is more dull than most but makes up for it in location and cha...

Endlessly charming, has some good airtime and I hope lives for many many more years. It is more dull than most but makes up for it in location and charm.

Looking really dingy, and quite rough throughout. However, it is very unique and surprisingly forceful with good laterals. Think if they did some work...

Looking really dingy, and quite rough throughout. However, it is very unique and surprisingly forceful with good laterals. Think if they did some work and made the throughput better it could be a little crowdpleaser.

Okay, if this coaster was even 50% smoother - it would be an sleeper hit intensity monster (I do love the feeling the old vekoma drops give). However,...

Okay, if this coaster was even 50% smoother - it would be an sleeper hit intensity monster (I do love the feeling the old vekoma drops give). However, this by far gave me the worst headache from any ride. Unbelieveably rough through the cobra roll. Really dampens the fun.

I can only describe Vampire as dated and strange. It was not uncomfortable or rough for me, but it just did not do very much which I do think is a tel...

I can only describe Vampire as dated and strange. It was not uncomfortable or rough for me, but it just did not do very much which I do think is a tell of it's age (and the fact arrow coasters seem to be like that). The most fun thing is the swinging through the trees and buildings feeling, but not really any intensity whatsoever. I do like the old school theming and it is a charming ride, but whether it can last much longer we'll see.

I have a bone to pick with Mandrill and that is why did you choose looks over feeling. It's quite bouncy, so the backwards portion in particular can f...

I have a bone to pick with Mandrill and that is why did you choose looks over feeling. It's quite bouncy, so the backwards portion in particular can feel nauseating and the helix is useless. However, I like the inversion with it's hangtime and the launches are quite punchy so that saves the ride. It fits the park well, but I feel like they could have gone for a better layout for experience.

If I were to pick a ride that I would say is the most FUN this would be in my top 3. An unbalanced car on this is so stupid, giggle inducing and wicke...

If I were to pick a ride that I would say is the most FUN this would be in my top 3. An unbalanced car on this is so stupid, giggle inducing and wickedly unpredictable and intense for it's stature. It is a lot milder when riding balanced, but still shockingly intense. The drops are great but the real highlight is spinning like a mad man (and I hate spinning normally). It is a little unreliable it seems, and capacity is pretty stinky but who cares - go off peak and go make yourself giggle.

There's no doubt about it, we have a world class ride in the UK. Yes it is on the shorter side, which I am personally okay with just because of how in...

There's no doubt about it, we have a world class ride in the UK. Yes it is on the shorter side, which I am personally okay with just because of how intense the ride feels. That first drop is pure magic, free floating then diving down. The outerbank is an insane feeling, so bizarre and just fantastic. And for me, someone who adores hangtime, this was made for me. The theming is not the best, and I hope they can fix up the landscaping which would help big time. The splashdown trim is a bit aggressive but necessary, and I also have no ill feelings towards that. Now, the 'rattle' is there on some trains (and only on some of the central cars) but it isn't painful or bad, it's just there - hopefully gets fixed over closed season (along with a myriad of reliability issues). And as expected, Mack's restraints are very comfortable. I love this ride, and whilst not perfect - it's the closest we have to it on our island and certainly my top. Can't wait to get a back row ride next season!