Coaster reviews
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First Drop Rattle Discomfort Tear it down!
Just as obscenely rough and painful as Wild Beast at the other end of the park, but this one is at least a bit fun. This ride (and park for that matter) would be made so much better by a RMC conversion, but Canadian law seems to have put killed any hopes of that, for now at least.
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Discomfort Tear it down! Pointless
Probably the worst wooden coaster I've ever ridden. Supremely uncomfortable and janky, combined with a nauseatingly boring layout, this ride manages to deliver no thrills while you endure the 3 minutes of torture this ride provides. Minebuster at the other side of the park is just as rough but at least is a bit more fun to ride; if you absolutely must a ride a woody while at Wonderland, just ride that one.
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Rattle Headbanging Discomfort
Lots of enthusiasts are quick to single this model of ride (the Zamperla Volare) out as the worst model of coaster ever made, and holy shit they're not wrong. My expectations were at rock bottom, and I was still blown away at how terrible of a ride this torture device gives. The ride is much rougher than you would expect from just watching it run from the outside, and the only things that you'll probably hear while riding are the clanging and rattling of metal and the screams of pain of you and your fellow passengers. People who complain about these are not exaggerating at all; the ride is pure misery, rivaled only by Green Lantern at Magic Mountain.
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Location Comfort Smoothness Intensity
An absolutely gorgeous, butter smooth B&M with an amazing location and some of the best near-miss keyholes in the game. It would be fair to describe this ride as a bit lacking in the force department, but it's still an iconic ride with some neat elements packed into its layout.
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Fun Intensity
Cute little ride that's feels more like a juiced up family coaster. Would definitely be great for easing non-enthusiasts onto bigger rides so you can hit Cedar Point's bigger rides with them later.
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Pace Intensity
I rode in the back and dear god this thing hauled, I greyed out on the loops because of how intense this thing was.
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First Drop Theming Pace Rattle
Energylandia is very proud of this coaster and is showing off a little bit, as Hyperion is located just next to the main parking, really close to the entrance. But believe me, this thing looks magnificent and the showing off is understandable. It is also very well themed, in a style which reminds Star Trek a little bit. The station looks epic and creates a proper atmosphere thanks to the movies which are displayed, lights etc. It is a shame, that final part of the queue is located outside the building, on the staircase - whole atmosphere disappears. In my first ride I was sitting in third row, in the middle - sits are located quite high and I could not place my legs on the ground (which is perfectly possible on the outside). First drop: Wow! It is followed by nice airtime on another hill. Second part of the ride is different - track is closer to the ground, there are nice corners there and finally, there is great portion of airtime close to the end. I was shocked how good this thing is. I went for another ride and, unfortunately, it was much worse than the first one. I do not know what is the reason: maybe the place I took (last row) or train (people complain about train no. 2 on polish forums) - but the ride was very uncomfortable due to constant rattle. It is still, however, a great, intense, well-themed coaster with amazing drop, great pace and nice layout.
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Fun Capacity
Let's start from the cons this time: the biggest problem is the capacity, as the queues are above 60 min for the most of the day. Trains (boats?) are designed only for 10 people, which is not enough. Second thing: theming. At least it exists, but the connection between speed and Pirates from Caribbean remains unknown for me. But let's move to the ride: elevator is really nice, first drop is not the best, but due to the angle it lasts quite long which is ok. Than there is first splash which does not make you wet and where, unfortunately, the speed is going down. Remaining part of the track is quite smooth, the pace is ok, but there is absolutely nothing worth mentioning. And the final... You can be VERY WET after the ride if you choose first or second row :).
