Coaster reviews

Fun Intensity

This was such an amazing ride before it got "cancaned". Especially on the Punpkin coaster event this thing provided a surreal experience. Although some people found this rough I found the roughness and the jerks providing the "Eurosat feeling" and therefore making this ride really stand out. Im really sad that this is gone. It used to be one of my favourite rides at EP.

Location Intensity Ejectors

This damn ride... my good lord. To this day, Lightning Rod is the one and only coaster that has given me an adrenaline rush that felt legitimately addictive. After almost every one of my 10 rides I NEEDED to get right back on it. Although it's had its well-documented reliability issues, I was lucky enough for it to be running very consistently when I visited last summer, to the point where a friend and I managed to marathon it for an hour or so on the first of our 2 days at Dollywood. The only time I didn't feel to re-ride was after that marathon session where I looked at my friend and said "yo my body needs a break." This thing is absolutely relentless from start to finish, and even so, it somehow hits another gear halfway through it. There are so many moments which characterise the nature of this coaster, but everything after the two wave turns is why Lightning Rod is my #1. From the off-axis airtime hill onwards, it's complete bedlam, and the quad down and subsequent speed hill might be my favourite coaster sequence I've ever experienced. As if the avalanche-like nature of the quad down wasn't enough, the speed hill which flies between the launch and the brake run, feels as though the train is crashing through a brick wall. Pure, unadulterated aggression. This coaster showed me definitively what my favourite coaster characteristics are - sense of speed, aggression, whippy elements and transitions, strong forces. Airtime is cool, but I much prefer it when it is implemented with the purpose of a sense of speed/aggression behind it, eg. LRod's world beating finale. LRod has the potential to stay at my #1 spot for a very long time. A truly special experience that very well may not be beaten for me anytime soon.

Fun Masterpiece Intensity Layout

I guess I will have to accept his ride for what it is. When I first rode last year I expected better but maybe I set my expectations too high but the intensity of it was very good and the zero g roll was brilliant as well it was also super fun going through many inversions, It was super fun shouting whilst we went through some fun inversions, some of the most fun I’ve had on a rollercoaster. but the layout isn’t the strongest. I think that shockwave at Drayton manor is inferior to it. It’s unfortunate that I only rode it twice because the 2nd ride was really good but the 1st was just decent. I think maybe new trains and a new theme in the area would make this ride look much nicer and more appealing. It is a John Wardley masterpiece I also remember seeing it for the first time and thinking “oh my god that looks insane” and we watched it go around it’s glossy track.

Intensity Discomfort Tear it down! Layout

Colossus at Thorpe Park. What a fucking mess. walking up to the ride, you get to see the literal shit covered track, manky and gross. all the ground around the ride is covered in litter and just dirt. You enter the hour plus queue because it has god awful capacity. you walk through the overgrown queue, passing by overfilled bins, more litter, but some decent shots of the coaster around you. you walk under a bridge into a cattlepen, no views of the ride, only cattlepen of people stupid enough to wait over an hour. you walk back under a manky bridge, and go pass a closed shop, and a prime view of black lift hill gunk. then you either get front row or every other row. Wait an extra 30 minutes on your wait already 30 min more than the advertised wait - but have a slightly less painful experience, or go in every other row and get assigned to the second row of a train because of course life hates you. You climb into a super cramped train, where anyone above the height of 5ft 2 will will have to awkwardly part their legs so you don't dislocate your knees on the row infront of you. Then pull down the stupidly heavy, bulky restraints, which you and the ride op need to pull down together because they're so heavy. So 5 minutes later you dispatch up the stupidly sluggish lift. you turn, getting a view of the infinitely better coaster (saw) right next to you, and it'll tease you with the fact Loggers leap is still standing. you go down the stupidly shallow drop, getting 1g of force in the back. Then you get to the bottom of the drop, and despite the decent force you feel, the could literally feels like it's going to fall apart like in a crappy cartoon. Then you go over a hill, with no airtime to speak of, and even if there was, the positives on the loop smashed to massive restraint so far down it's destroying your thighs. You enter the Cobra Roll, as your head gets smashed around all the way though the element until the jank exit. Then you enter the best part of the ride, the first corkscrew, you do get whipped through the element, which is rather fun if you brace yourself on you bulky restraint, but then there's the second one which is stupidly brutally rough. Then you crawl through a forgiving break in the pain, into the worst element(s) on any coaster I've ever experienced. The first Roll smashes your head to the side, and presses it the you head to the restraint like a vice, while your thighs are being brutalised with super sustained hangtime. the you fall back into your seat, just to have another super painful roll, then another, then another. Each worse than the last and. the you enter a brief moment of dread as the most sustained roll happens, smashing your head in the opposite direction. Then you crawl into the brakes, where you will have to wait for a stupidly long time due to the dreadful operations. Then you leave to go do something better.

Children’s ride ride in front row and was disappointed

Theming Nice surprise! Fun Capacity

Not as good as the left track but I think it’s because i was in the middle behind a fat girl. No wait thanks to covid

Theming Nice surprise! Fun Capacity

Walked on both alpha and omega thanks to an empty park from covid. Haven’t been on this since I was very very young and was pleased

Smoothness Dead spots

Smoothies tried ever. Front row was a bit slow, back row was better.

First Drop Lap Bar Fun

The Ride is a very great ride from somebody who lives in florida and has been to both fun spot parks and has riden both woodies over 25 times I'll have to give it to mine blower for being the more intense ride and thats good for me since i like intense coasters and the drop is very good in the back

Theming Discomfort

First of all, the queue is EXTREMELY long, but with nice theming and even some funhouse-style elements. The first drop is quite intense in the back row, with a very forceful airtime moment which you won't expect on such a small coaster. Unfortunately, the cars are extremely cramped, so my knee smashed against the handrailing during the airtime. The rest of the layout is a little rattly and nothing too spectacular...